Skip to main content

our first date

Hi.

Awkward, I know. Imagine how I feel. (Remembering to space only once after each period. Knowing that I will ultimately space twice at some point.  Oops.) I knew that this would be difficult...the whole putting myself out there thing...what if we don't make it past this first meeting--you, me, us, here, now....

I know that I can write whatever I want; that's the beauty of blogging, right? But this is kind of like dating...I mean, sure I can say whatever I want, but if I want to keep you around, I need to convince you that I'm worth taking on a second date. I have to create mystery and intrigue...establish a rapport, remind you of someone you admire, make you think of something I said (or will say) at a later time. I don't want to appear desperate--only a quick spritz of perfume and a bit of rouge, not too much cleavage (nothing to worry about there)...chapstick, not lipstick.


I never used to care what people thought. Okay, that's not true. Let me rephrase. I've always cared what others thought of me, but when I was younger, I didn't care if the attention I received from others was positive or negative, as long as it was attention. Well, that's not quite right either. I cared, I just didn't consider what type of attention said action would receive until after I'd actually committed the action.

Sure my seventh grade self willingly volunteered my shoe as a football when the substitute teacher took the actual football away from us. Sure I felt like big stuff knowing that the game continued because of me. Sure, my bare foot felt lonely-gritty-off kilter-- walking back to the classroom after the same substitute teacher refused to return the football and my shoe. No, I know that's not really funny, but it was definitely humiliating. Cool to superzero in less than five minutes. Oh no. I'm already rambling, aren't I? And blushing now too...I can feel it.

So enough about me; what about you? Why are you here?  What do you expect to gain? Insight into my insecurities? You've come to the right place. A taste of my opinion? Just remember, you asked for it. A look at my flaws? Have you not been paying attention? Fashion advice? Oh, now you're just flirting with me...seriously though, remind me to tell you my panty story sometime....Are you curious? Bored?

Well, alright then. I'm feeling better already.  Really, I'm just pretending that you aren't even there. I'm not anticipating what you want, I'm focusing on what I'm ready to tell you. And, if we continue to see each other, I think I may become comfortable revealing more and more. After all, that's what dating, um blogging, is all about, right?



Copyright © 2011. Carrie Ellen Campbell. All Rights Reserved. http://carriellencampbell.blogspot.com. Please respect Carrie's intellectual property. Sharing blog posts is permitted, but no part of this material may be copied, downloaded, reproduced, or printed without express written consent. Contact Carrie at: carrieellencampbell@icloud.com.

Comments

  1. Excellent start Carrie! I've already fallen in love with you :) and we just met! haha kidding! You're going to win hearts, cause confusion (that's not meant in a bad way), gain respect, create clarity, spark interest, break free and grow in depth beyond your grasp! Awesome :) Looking forward to the next!

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

The Shepherd

            “Damned coyotes.” Clifton Ellis followed the blood trail from the sheep shed with no hope of finding the stolen lamb. The ewe bleated, unconsoled. In a terrified frenzy, she’d trampled the lamb’s twin during the coyotes’ last visit. Now, she was alone within the flock.

Cooking: a necessary evil (when one loves to eat)

I should be well over 300 pounds. Only God's good will, or more likely his good sense of humor, keeps me thin. That's not completely true. What's that?  Oh, yeah. I do that a lot. Interrupt one thought with another.  You'll learn that about me. No, I don't think it is ADD. Anyway....It isn't completely true, because I rarely sit still. You'll learn that about me too. Yes, I agree, HD (hyperactivity disorder) is likely...have you met my children? Look, can we talk about the fact that I'm squirmy some other time?  I want to tell you why I should be fat. First, let me say...yeah, that's another habit...I tend to preface everything. I'll explain that compulsion later too. I warned you: I'm complicated--I just happen to know myself quite well. Let me say that I love big people: big bones, big personalities, big hugs, large frame, fat and happy, XL, XXL, XXXL, and all. I love people who embrace who they are at any and all sizes. During many ages ...

the things I'll never understand part I

Aidan was sixmonthsold. It was a hot July--no rainfull respites. It was hot, and relief came only indoors and in the shade. I love theme park food. Pickles--bigandoverpriced--funnelcakes--spaghetti with twohugemeatballs....somewhere behind Pompeii, across from the wax roses and cut crystal....Busch Gardens, Williamsburg. If I was going to sit, I might as well eat too...and why not catch a show while we were at it? It was one of those situations in which the show didn't really matter--it could be mud wrestling, and we weren't going to move. The seats and the shade and the cold drinks felt good--the spaghetti too, and Aidan contented himself in his stroller--Hallelujah! All things bright and beautiful--cooler too. The show was a song and dance review...imagine any theme park amphitheatre, add some flashy costumes and you've got it...my mom loves these things (smile). Okay, I'll admit it, I kind of like them too....only, I'm jaded, so I pretend to play it cool. I p...